Is He Missing You?

This week I’ve been thinking a lot about pacifiers. Kinda like when you go on a diet and there are foods you’re not allowed to eat, you know? Those banned foods suddenly rise to power and rule the thoughts with an enchanting dictatorship of desiring the Forbidden, which you may have rarely even wanted before!

In my (or should I say, “my child’s”) case this week, the pacifiers have been given a mandatory break from childcare duty at our house. So believe me, I’ve been thinking a lot about pacifiers!

To say the truth, I think it might be even harder on the Mommy and Daddy than the little girl. 

When as charming a human as she is looks at you with big, imploring eyes that stream with crocodile-sized tears while obviously begging for the banned silicone sucker... Oh dear, it’s enough to make any tough cookie crumble!

But I am not writing this page to talk about the whether-or-not-s of pacifier usage for infants, as I am quite unsuited for that task. I can, however, write about what I’ve been learning about myself this week.

I have been seeing myself in my tiny girl.

When she is craving that pacifier, I’ve had to wonder: Where do I go when a craving rises in me to be “pacified”? When I feel that hunger in me for something to soothe my soul, where do I go? Do I instinctively nuzzle towards the Source of all my heart’s satisfaction and the One who truly can meet all my needs, filling my mouth with good things? Or do I guzzle on a "piece of silicone" incessantly, thinking I have all I need when it’s not giving me a thing that lasts? I could be satisfying myself in the richness of my Father!

Several nights ago our Joy-Angel cried like her little heart had broken apart, as we rocked, talked, sang, and choked on the cries that were coming up our throats as well. Oh, how I wanted with all of my big mama-heart to give her that little pacifier and make her happy!! But then a different flavor of tears came to my eyes, as I heard my Heavenly Father whispering, “I get these feelings too”. 

As I tried to be a comfort to the restless infant, I saw myself, God's little one, in her restlessness. I realized in a new way like never before how my Heavenly Papa is watching me lovingly, as I instinctively realize the hungry longing of my soul. What a sad sense of loss he bears, when instead of running to HIM, full of faith that I’m just about to get satisfied, I grope around and choose some sort of empty “pacifier” to take His place! Oh, how He wants to make me feel satisfied and happy! Oh, may I learn to let nothing keep me from choosing HIM!

As I write this post today, my daughter is contentedly nursing in my arms, snuggled warmly up in her favorite fuzzy blanket. The intense longing for her pacifier has vanished in all the sweetness I have to offer. To me, the restful beauty of the two of us is being mentally superimposed over these words:

“[Jehovah] satisfieth thy mouth with good things, so that thy youth is renewed...” - Psa 103:5

How precious to know that He wants to satisfy my mouth with good things...and since He IS the origin of all good things, I can know that He wants to satisfy my mouth with His very own Self!

If your Heavenly Father is removing something you like very much from your life this week for reasons you don’t understand, good news! Be encouraged, because it’s probably a sign He’s missing you. He just wants to be closer to you and spend more time satisfying your heart!

(Note: I know the subject of pacifiers is quite controversial and I’m not trying to say that pacifiers are evil or that I’m sorry I’ve used one. In my experience of late however my daughter started turning to pacifiers at times when in my classification she needed to be turning to me! Thus the thoughts in this post.)